Plastic Dons: Enemy Stink, Old Son!
During recent years, whenever Morecambe have played the EFL club based in Milton Keynes, I have only reported on what went on in the games as far as the Shrimps were concerned. I have deliberately not mentioned the name the Plastic Dons like to be known by; their Chairman; their Manager; their players; their league position or their current form. I intend to uphold that approach today. Why?
This outfit should not be in the EFL at all and it is literally a scandal that they are. It stinks.
It is certain, very regrettably, that the Cuckoo club that stole the old Wimbledon FC’s very soul as well as its corporate identity will be in at least the Play-Offs for a place in the Championship this season. They could still even win automatic promotion. I really hope that such an eventuality will not happen. I would like their Play-Off campaign to end in failure as well. I personally wish that it was them struggling at the bottom of League One instead of the phoenix club which battled its way through a succession of non-leagues (six altogether, starting all over again in a Combined Counties League which hardly anybody has ever heard of) over a sustained period. Against all odds, AFC Wimbledon has finally succeeded in re-establishing a Crazy Gang heritage at a brand new stadium on Plough Lane. They have done this as dodgy people at the FA and the English Football League effectively rubber-stamped the sale of their original club to the owners of the Milton Keynes interlopers who have always enjoyed a `special’ relationship with them. The whole thing stinks and it is an insult to all the other clubs who have had to make the long and arduous journey towards EFL membership – such as ourselves – instead of being handed it on a plate without ever having to work their way up from the bottom of the Football Pyramid in this country.
At this stage of the season, though, I need to say more about the Plastic Dons than I would like. I’m delighted to report that they were beaten last Tuesday night by the only goal of the game at Oxford. This meant that they went into today’s match in third position in League One, level on points with stumbling Rotherham but a whole five behind leaders Wigan. Both of the leading clubs have also played one game fewer than the imposters. With just two games left of the league campaign, a win today for the Cuckoos was thus essential to maintain any hope at all of automatic promotion.
But it was even more important for their visitors, albeit for totally different reasons. With just six more points available to them, the Shrimps arrived in Buckinghamshire’s biggest and ugliest New Town three points and two places clear of Fleetwood. The failing Cod Army occupied the highest of the relegation berths in the division but still had a crucial game in hand. At the bottom, appallingly administered Crewe were relegated a while ago as our own Dave Artell paid the price for a total lack of ambition or investment in the Boardroom who sold his best players and didn’t replace them. Doncaster had no realistic hope of escaping the drop, either.
So that leaves two of ourselves; Fleetwood; AFC Wimbledon and Gillingham to make up the other doomed clubs. The Shrimps were six points better off than the authentic Dons, however – with a better goal difference and the same number of games played.
So all Morecambe fans had at least one eye focused on Highbury as their own game was progressing today. There, the Cod Army and the Wombles were involved in a Life or Death struggle to see which of them was most likely to drop back into League Two. AFC Wimbledon basically needed to win for the first time in 26 matches to have any hope at all of avoiding the Drop. If Fleetwood won, though, their chances of staying up on the last day next week would improve markedly, particularly as their goal difference is far superior to ours and the fact that they have two – not just one – games still to contest. So for us, a Wombles win or – perhaps better still – a draw would be the best possible outcome.
We would all be looking out for the score from Fratton Park as well, where Pompey were potentially holding the fate of the final member of the Legion of the Almost Damned – Gillingham – in their hands. The Kent club is still clinging on to League One survival largely because of the efforts of leading scorer Vadaine Oliver. He was never allowed to fulfil his potential at Morecambe – where he was played on his own up front more often than not with no support from midfield or anywhere else. With that basic backup provided for him at both Northampton and his current employers, however, he has been doing the same job for the Gills that his replacement at Morecambe – Cole Stockton – has done for us in recent times.
Vadaine’s latest club started proceedings this afternoon just two points behind the Shrimps. They found themselves in twentieth place in the division with the same number of games played but with a slightly inferior Goal Difference. If they lost and Morecambe won this afternoon; the Shrimps would be safe. But if they won and Morecambe lost, Gillingham would be in the Box Seat to stay in League One this term.
King Derek announced before the game:
“We will have to be at our best. If we go there to sit in for long periods of time that won’t help us because of their talent. We’ve got a point (in hand) at this moment in time but we need to try and win the match. We’ve shown we are very good on the counter attack – we’ve got quick players, direct players and players in the final third that can score goals.”
Just to complicate things still further, not too far up the road in Buckinghamshire, Wycombe were battling with Sheffield Wednesday today to consolidate their positions in the League One Play-Offs. Wednesday were fourth in the standings prior to the clash; Wanderers sixth. Next Tuesday, the Yorkshire club travel to Lancashire to face Fleetwood for what could be a season-defining game for both clubs. So – for all the teams mentioned above – the stakes could hardly be higher today.
Aaron Wildig was not fit enough to start this afternoon so his place was taken by Toumani Diagouraga and Cole the Goal Stockton assumed the Captaincy of the team.
So – abacus’ as well as notebooks at the ready in the Press Room – the game finally started.
Morecambe had the first half-chance of a poor first forty-five minutes of football when Cole attempted to lob the home goal after four minutes only to see the ball clear the bar. Adam Phillips was caught off-side straight after this. From then on, however, they offered very little going forward. They failed to test the home goalkeeper at any time during the opening period and they didn’t force even a single corner. Worse still, the hosts scored after just a quarter of an hour as the home team stood off as one of their central defenders was allowed to lumber right up the pitch and take a shot which beat Trevor Carson all ends up. It was a really sloppy goal to concede. At half time, the score was thus one-nil to the MK outfit.
Elsewhere, Fleetwood went a goal down to AFC Wimbledon, which was the score at the break. Gillingham also fell behind at Portsmouth but pulled themselves back into it to draw one each after 45 minutes. But then Pompey scored again in injury time to leave Gillingham in the mire all over again. Morecambe were thus still in Pole Position, with Fleetwood looking vulnerable and AFC Wimbledon going down fighting. To confuse things even further, seemingly doomed Doncaster were managing to beat Burton Albion by the only goal of the game so far. But how would this situation change during the second half?
Back on the field, Morecambe at least managed to force a corner shortly after the re-start but Adam Phillips’ dead ball kick – as with most of his contribution today – was poor. As news filtered through that Gillingham’s Manager Neil Harris had been sent to the stands at Fratton Park, Carson made a couple of decent saves to keep Morecambe in the match. Then the Shrimps shipped another poor goal as a shot was slightly deflected by Rhys Bennett past his own unsighted goalkeeper with eighty minutes on the clock. The Shrimps Goal Difference – which could still prove to be their Achilles’ Heel – would have worsened even more but for a fantastic save by Trevor after 84 minutes; this time using his feet to keep another shot out of the net. A poor game finally ground to an end with the Shrimps putting on a very disappointing display at a time when they really could not afford to do so.
Derek Adams tried to put a positive spin on it after the game. He said:
“We’re in a much better position than we were before the game. Before the game, there was four team in it; now there’s only three teams in it.”
Very true. He didn’t say this – but it also could have been much worse…
Wimbledon were winning at Highbury until just two minutes before the end. Then their goalkeeper was penalised for an offence that most of us didn’t know even existed (using his boot to position the ball and then kicking it, which is apparently not allowed); conceded an indirect free-kick in his own area – and Fleetwood equalised against the run of play. The point took the Cod Army out of the relegation positions and they now lay one place and two points behind the Shrimps tonight, still with that magic game in hand. AFC Wimbledon – realistically – are down as a result. Let’s hope they’re back again soon. They can’t overhaul Morecambe in any case now – but both Fleetwood and Gillingham can. On Tuesday, the Cod Army face Sheffield Wednesday, who lost at Wycombe today. Wednesday need to win to get into the League One Play-Offs. On the same night, Sunderland host Rotherham United in a game which has massive implications for the promotion hopes for both sides. So it could be that by the time the Black Cats travel to Morecambe next Saturday; their place in the Play-Offs will be secure. But there again…
I think that – in reality – the real focus of attention next Saturday will be at Priestfield in Kent and The Maz in north Lancashire. Gillingham host Rotherham United who – even if they win at Sunderland on Tuesday – will need all three points to guarantee automatic promotion. If the Gills – with their Manager now banned from the touchline – are beaten; the Shrimps could still lose to Sunderland and stay in League One. But their fate still remains in their own hands: if they simply beat the promotion hopefuls, they will stay up.
As I say, thing really could be much worse. Whatever happens, at least we don’t have the magic of Stephen Robinson to contend with any more. If he had remained in charge, Morecambe would without any doubt have been dead and buried long before now. Today, his new team contrived to lose the ninth of the ten games he has been in charge of. St Mirren were defeated this time at home by Hibernian, who scored the only goal of the game. In Paisley, the natives are restless…
As for Morecambe’s opposition today… who cares? The sooner they are relegated to the M25 Outer Orbital Relegation League where they actually belong, the better.
Oh – and why did I write `Enemy Stink Old Son’ as the heading for this article? MK Plastic Dons and the deal that was done to create them in the first place stinks. True enough. But `Enemy Stink Old Son’ is also an anagram of Milton Keynes Dons – the ridiculous name by which they like to be known. (Who says these articles are thrown together at the last moment?…)
A longer version of this report will appear later as the penultimate entry so far on
shrimplythebestfootball.com
In case you have missed anything so far, an account of the entire season so far can also be found there as well.
Morecambe’s team today: 30 Trevor Carson; 3 Greg Leigh; 5 Jacob Bedeau; 9 Cole Stockton (C); 8 Toumani Diagouraga; 11 Dylan Connolly (Y); 18 Adam Phillips (Y); 22 Liam Gibson (Y); 24 Arthur Gnahoua (17 Jonah Ayunga 60’); 27 Ousmane Fané (19 Shane McLoughlin 73’); 31 Rhys Bennett.
Subs Not Used: 41 Adam Smith; 4 Anthony O’Connor; 10 Aaron Wildig; 21 Ryan Cooney; 25 Alfie McCalmont.
Ref: Lee Swabey.
401 fans from Morecambe attended this game. Well done to all of them.
